HRH may have her guards standing to attention but they bend over for me ;-) อ่านเพิ่ม
"You deserve a lover...." Frida Kahlo
"You deserve a lover who wants you disheveled, with everything and all the reasons that wake you up in a haste and the demons that won’t let you sleep. You deserve a lover who makes you feel safe, who can consume this world whole if he walks hand in hand with you; someone who believes that his embraces are a perfect match with your skin. You deserve a lover who wants to dance with you, who goes to paradise every time he looks into your eyes and never gets tired of studying your expressions. You deserve a lover who listens when you sing, who supports you when you feel shame and respects your fr อ่านเพิ่ม
wide open
unedited train of thought... June has been pretty magical. I spent most of it waiting to see someone special but it sadly never happened and now things have changed....for the better. A month of self care, stretching, reading, basking in the sun, drinking medicinal tea, skin care, feeding my soul. The sex from the solstice onwards was utter perfection, just what and who I needed. A trio of incredible men. The final one was the most powerful. I've had a lot of sex since I left my wondrous gf but this was the first time I felt myself completely relax and let go with. Don't get me wrong, อ่านเพิ่ม
Sweet spots
Foot to cunt & cock...... KI1 cum to edging calm..... DU20 G-spot Prostate Belly rubs and Stomach 30 press with eye contact the sacral nerves the mind อ่านเพิ่ม
Snapshots: Queer death drive/ecstasy
Sex and death The family line ends here Disposable queer lives in the heterosexual mainstream. Your life literally thrown out in the rubbish I watched Hannah Gadsby's show 'Nanette' on Netflix. It was me, most queers and butches really. Making everyone laugh, having the anecdotes and deftly excising the horror behind them. The mainstream world is awful but it's important to look for the beauty. It's everywhere if you look in the right places. The trick is to connect all the golden moments. I learned to disassociate from an early age due to the traumatic situation I was in with those that bir อ่านเพิ่ม
ghosts, zeros, ones and hard flesh
It's quite disconcerting falling for someone who doesn't exist, or who disappears without a trace. For someone who changes who they are online. Fabricates a life to patch over their own failings. We all do it to some degree. I had to disagree strongly with the ex Col about police informers though. He undoes the damage of war to land and mind, so he's not all bad/oblivious. on an aside I seem to encountering a flood of intelligence men. Enough to make an ex hardcore anarchist paranoid. I dated the navy officer who had me under surveillance, albeit 20 years ago. I lived under 24/7 watch for a ye อ่านเพิ่ม
blood and fury
Premenstrual which is a good sign. I've never quite managed to tap into that fury and make something good of it. Perhaps being outside would help, or mushrooms or hard raw fucking till I can't walk? When I didn't bleed I felt so cut off from the moon. I've always liked the idea of eating my aborted fetus. Keep your sanitised hands off it. It belongs inside me. In another world my ex gf & I had our c***dren and lived happily ever after. What to do in this world except move on, forge different paths and mourn briefly. Fight the good fight. Take care of all the others. a****l and human. อ่านเพิ่ม
Ebbs and flows
Before you know it you can be swept away on a fast-moving current. Fires that start underground are long-lasting. A recent connection mentioned "my tribe". I felt I had one...the (properly) radical left, the type that go into hiding and dedicate their lives to huge projects. I'm still recovering from extreme burn out from that life and part of me feels resentful as I gave my all for what? It's hard to remind yourself of the changes you make in people. My students are ass kicking wondrous young women. I'm so proud of the input I've had in their lives and journey. They may look up to me but I a อ่านเพิ่ม
The importance of language
I've always thought words carry so much weight and power. Some people hang onto every single word you utter and paint you forever with them. For some they are light as feathers. Time changes a person. I prefer the visceral. Bodies don't lie. "You can do anything to me" Be very very careful saying that. Do you want me to make your voice change pitch as you scream and start to cry, forgetting your safe word & requiring me to remind you? Do you want your face covered in spit and pushed into my wet cunt, pissed in, cum on, stretched, filled & pushed? Shit on you? Vomit over your rock hard อ่านเพิ่ม
water
It's best to be like water, adaptable. Shallow as a puddle or as deep as the ocean when required, going with the flow, changing a route to fit you. The 13 year itch is the new 7 year itch. She and I are o.v.e.r and the time creeps up to finally wrench us apart. We're more than family. Intertwined but separate. I understand the loss of real love now. Much like death, but changing form. I'll always have her back. We used to speak about not cracking under interrogation...you know who you can depend on in desperate times. I don't think a man could ever compare. e e cummings is one of my favou อ่านเพิ่ม
Chasing shadows
With the lights off, or from behind, every man becomes him. How sad and consoling. อ่านเพิ่ม
Somewhere in the middle
he said I was too deep she said I didn't think enough he said I was a rarity she said I was a sex addict he said I shouldn't have to pay for anything she said I should share my resources he said he worshipped the ground I walked on she said I betrayed her like no other he said his wife would love me she said i was straight he said he wished I was untouched she said there's no shame in your sexuality he said he found me refreshing she said we'd grow old together he said I was his Girl she said I was her Burt Reynolds to her Dolly he said he wanted a partner in crime She would never give me up อ่านเพิ่ม
Activists and servicemen
aka Shit no one talks about. or sleeping with the enemy Drop them and give me fifty Just spent a few hours hanging out with an old acquaintance from my peace camp days. Confessed my deep attraction to servicemen and she spilled......talked about drinking with/fucking the squaddies and sailorboys during her time there and how it scandalised everyone. She was one of the best, everyone's Heroine ad poster c***d of the movement back then........because well fuck me the left wing are so middle class they can't feasibly understand we're all damn human, and some of us have more in common with the ot อ่านเพิ่ม
More than
It's easy to seduce someone, but can you go the distance? Will you remain interested? I ask that myself too. I'm easily bored and need both mind and body stimulated. I'm expanding my boundaries, mainly with younger men. Beards!! Young, not dumb and full of cum. Stamina is a huge plus. I'm highly impressed with the ex army dominant aesthete so far. Bizarrely he's the doppelganger of someone special and highly similar too with his desires. Let's hope he's not an utter wanker. Fingers crossed, legs open. อ่านเพิ่ม
Flow
I may be high from the fumes of the cleaner the tradesmen are using. I can feel I'm at shifting borderlines. Whatever the outcome will be. I need to be light Adaptable like water Some people are scared of depth. I think you need to plunge in sometimes, not all the time or you'll drown, otherwise you turn to other crutches and devices treading water to keep afloat. d**gs, alcohol, sex, food, shopping, the gym. Control & contain Boxes don't always work. I know that all too well. Hold your breath, dive in and open your eyes....when your'e ready It won't hurt for long. อ่านเพิ่ม
D/S
My submission is one of my deepest gifts. I struggle with my desire to hold you by your throat, pin you down, keeping eye contact and taking what I want, doing whatever I want to you, wanting to change your body, change the sounds you make, wrench you open to the core. Make you better. I'm thinking about all of this as I'm on my knees sucking your cock, my hands in your ass, bent over for you, watching you melt, watching you get high, watching you escape from it all into the air. อ่านเพิ่ม
Sexual triggers
Jet planes flying overhead, and when it's him I go sky high too RP english accents Tweed Rubber Stationary New sketchbooks The smell and creak of leather certain types of hairstyle receding hairlines black hair & blue eyes on women the number 43 Seeing the name K*****g chesterfields Power tools skiing scrambling through the undergrowth and up the sides of waterfalls the smell of petrol and diesel woodsmoke getting caught going undercover fresh sweat the smell of horse shit women in boiler suits the sound of a wet cock or cunt heels hairy chests & wicked grins watching cum spurt watchin อ่านเพิ่ม
Glasshouses
I've always hated folk who judge but I've been guilty of it myself lately. I deeply apologise. After losing years of my life, and seeing others in similar positions, I've become passionate about people being true to their desires but it's not always an easy thing to do. I struggled out of consideration for my ex. It didn't benefit either of us. I move in left wing creative circles and frankly still live in a queer bubble. I don't have to deal with the mainstream world much at all. I've a strength of character and don't care what anyone thinks of me much. I had a non physical affair of sort อ่านเพิ่ม
O Fantasma trailer
O fantasma trailer - Dir João Pedro Rodrigues Damn great film. Check it out if you can. Alan Vega too. <3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlVcdP3LoRY I may be all femme now but in my heart I'm a still a fag. my sexual freedom and passion comes from a radical queer world. Remember that when I'm giving you best blowjob you'll ever have had.....When I hold your gaze as my cock enters your ass. ...when my hands pull on your balls and stretch you open. Twenty years of queer life doesn't just disappear when you switch to fucking straight men. I'm not your average woman. #pornfilmfestival อ่านเพิ่ม